Thursday, November 17, 2016

Honestly, I have no idea what the deal is with Uggie.  I mean, he could be cleaned up pretty nice after a decent hair cut and a bath, he could even pass off as some respectable civilized designer dog who at one point came from a pet store and got carried around in someone's diamond stud purse... but when he eats, he just seems to go in a deep trance.  Like, when a bowl of food is placed in front of him, his mind just drifts into outer space, every cell in his body tremors with blissful excitement over a bowl of dog food,  and it takes some serious celestial effort to call him back.

Fie Fie and Kelly would inspect the food, but while they were inspecting and sniffling, Uggie had already finished his bowl in the blink of an eye and patiently waiting to see if there's any left overs from the other dogs.  If I don't keep an eye out, he would finish his fair share, eat Kelly's left over, Fie Fie's entire portion because unlike Uggie, Fie Fie thinks his food would be right where he left it.  And then, Uggie would explode into many pieces from having OD on food, until 4 hours later, in the middle of the night, when I hear someone, perhaps a burglar, frantically trying to lick the shit out of an empty bowl in the kitchen because by god I swear the food MIGHT just happened to show up in his mouth after licking really hard into an EMPTY bowl.

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